HostBlog - incoherent ramblings of a hosting provider.

• Are household chores cutting into your social life ?
• How many important calls have you missed whilst doing laundry ?
• Dont want to take two appliances into the utility room ?

Then you need …. An Iron Phone

Cleverly combining two of a womans favourite things ( ironing and talking ) into one handy little tool - yes the Iron-Phone really is the social-life saver you have been waiting for.

Now you need never miss that crucial chat with someone you’ll see in person later anyway, about the spotty guy from work and his small dinkle problem …

With 30 minutes of steaming, and 11 hours of talktime on a single charge, it’s powerful enough for even the most dedicated follower of fashion …

Tags: laundry, utility room, ironing, talking

This just amused me

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“Punchable” is how the tabloids have been describing online scammer Liam Young of OXYUK.

For those that missed his entry into the Big Brother House here’s the video summary …
Habitual Liar Liam Young Enters The Big Brother House

And for completeness sake, here’s link to the video of the lttle bollock-sucker getting evicted from the Big-Brother-House …
Liam Young BB Con Artist Gets Booted

Well, C4’s Big Brother series has started again, with a selection of Endemol hand-picked “characters” to represent a cross section of the UK’s up-and-coming lads and lasses … presumably some attempt by the program makers to “appeal” to a new audience, as the viewing figures continue to decline.

One of the contestants (HouseMates as they’re called) is getting oxycuted by blogs and forums - Mr Liam Young of OxyUK / OxyTechnologies / OxyMorons etc…

I bumped heads with this pOXY muppet back when he was 16, claiming

We currently serve over 70,000 UK customers, and over 10,000 users from worldwide locations

which actually translated into

I’m a shitty little unknown affiliate for Lycos and I get paid a few $ if you sign-up under me

see Liam Young of OXYUK.Ltd

the following day he’d moved the few real clients he had and magically transformed into being a HostGator reseller
Oxy just a HG Reseller

18 months later business is going so well, on some forums he’s claiming 2 million domains on his servers, and on others he’s begging for $2 support jobs … Please employ me

You’d think someone with millions of domains, would be a Nominet member (www.nic.uk) rather than just a 1und1 customer … http://webwhois.nic.uk/cgi-bin/whois.cgi?query=oxyhost.co.uk

After getting shortlisted for the role on BB as an entrepreneur, he then reappears on the same forum that banned him for his bulshit last time - WebHostingTalk.com, asking How to lie about Turnover

The general thread on WHT is good background …
http://www.webhostingtalk.com/showthread.php?t=660543

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Various forums are all now getting cross-posted to each other, the now (almost) infamous Liam Young Big Brother Celebrity Hijack Lier Housemate is getting discussed over on DigitalSpy

As yet unconfirmed - and I REALLY am not going hunting for evidence on this - but there are multiple posts and comments about Liam Young doing himself Anal’y with a glowstick dildo - *nice* !

The DS:BB thread is already over 5 pages long, and currently if you’re not a member shows multiple adverts for gay dating agencies throughout the threads on Liam - do they know something we dont perhaps ?

*edit* I just checked back after fixing a typo and the DS:BB thread is touching *twenty-nine* pages !

Deep in an underground bunker, mad scientist geeks are working night and afternoon (real geeks are like vampires, alergic to sunlight) on the next google launch …

ANDROIDS

This week the big-G registered and drop-caught a number of new domains now sitting on the G’s nameservers including…

• androidhandset.com
• androidhandsets.com
• androidmobile.com
• androidphone.com
• androidphones.com
• androidplatform.com
• androidsdk.com
• androidsoftware.com
• androidtechnology.com

Plus all the usual org/net variations.

No official comment has been made yet about the rumoured launch of the first human looking g-phone.

Personally I’m hoping it looks a lot like a cross between the current bionic woman, seven-of-nine and Caprica-6 with big buttons

Well, it’s almost the end of the year, so in every industry it’ll be Lists and Resolutions for a while now…

The constant dross is on the goggle-box, designed either to make you conform, or simply to confirm that 99% of viewers are brain-dead like…

• 100 most unappaling songs ever
• 100 mind-numbing sports personalities
• 100 most repeated comedy moments
• 100 innuendos from a-n-other gay icon
• 100 worst farts left in a lift
• 100 ways to kill yourself over a list

etc.

Now normally I have enough to-do lists of my own to worry about, and that kind of cr@p gets well avoided, however the annual round-up of business c*ck-ups from Fortune magazine does at least hold some elements of humour… And CNN have kindly stuck it online for those of you who don’t normally read mags - the ones with *those* pictures in doesn’t really count as reading now does it - no matter how good the articles

#16

While working on an article about Microsoft, Wired contributing editor (and former Fortune writer) Fred Vogelstein receives a 13-page dossier about himself, describing him as “tricky” and his stories as “sensational.” The document, prepared by the company’s public relations firm, Waggener Edstrom Worldwide, as background for Microsoft executives, was sent inadvertently to the writer

Quoted from CNN/Fortune Magazie

Fortune and The Business are well worth the ~£3/issue - go on, skip a starbucks to buy a copy and get some knowledge inside you, rather than brown slop that tastes like tarmac.

If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were still alive, their infamous comedy sketch “Who’s on First?” might have turned out something like this …

Costello telephones a computer retail chain picked from the Yellow Pages

ABBOTT: Super-Duper Computer Sales. How can I help you?

COSTELLO: Thanks. I’m setting up an office in my den and I’m thinking about buying a computer.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: No, the name’s Lou.

ABBOTT: Your computer?

COSTELLO: I don’t own a computer. I want to buy one.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: I told you, my name’s Lou.

ABBOTT: What about Windows?

COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?

COSTELLO: I don’t know. What will I see when I look at the windows?

ABBOTT: Wallpaper.

COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

ABBOTT: Software for Windows?

COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals track expenses and run my business. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

ABBOTT: I just did.

COSTELLO: You just did what?

ABBOTT: Recommend something.

COSTELLO: You recommended something?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: For my office?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!

ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.

COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let’s just say I’m sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?

ABBOTT: Word.

COSTELLO: What word?

ABBOTT: Word in Office.

COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?

ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue “W”.

COSTELLO: I’m going to click your blue “w” if you don’t start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: That’s right. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.

COSTELLO: What’s bundled with my computer?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.

COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

ABBOTT: One copy.

COSTELLO: Isn’t it illegal to copy money?

ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

Fast Forward to a few days after delivery…

ABBOTT: Super-Duper Computer Sales. How can I help you?

COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

ABBOTT: Click on “START”…….

There are several men sitting around in the changing room of a private health club after exercising.
Suddenly a mobile on one of the benches rings. One of the men picks it up, and the following conversation ensues:
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Since AOL’s decision to dish out the seized property of a convicted spammer in their
AOL Ca$h Cars and Gold Sweepstakes I’ve been pondering ways of integrating spammers into society - a sort of virtual care in the community concept.

Extending my unique personal solutions for Immigration, BSE/Mad Cow Disease, Foot & Mouth, Live Aid/8 and V.A.T - i believe a fully working system concept is now ready for patent, with a potential rollout 1st quarter next year.

Several ISPs have already shown an interest, and the volunteer collection force are undergoing extensive training right now …

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These notes are from an inexperienced Chili taster named Frank, who was visiting a country fair whilst in Austin, Texas…

Frank: “Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a Chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge’s table asking for directions to the Coors Beer Tent, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn’t be all that spicy and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted”. (more…)